Back to normality, I suppose.
Even though I failed to produce a negative covid test over the past week and half, today (my last day of isolation) it happened.
Yeah today I produced a negative covid test, I could have done with a couple of them over the weekend, hey ho i suppose it is what it is.
So negative or not I’m back at work tomorrow anyway, so normality will feel nice. Getting out feels loads better, yeah the same 4 walls can become a bit shit.
Ok very shit.
The company wasn’t bad, at least I wasn’t alone. If I’d have had a positive test while here in my room (yeah still living in shared house) and isolated totally alone, I think I would have gone way out of my head.
At least treacle tits and boy were around me to keep me sane, well sane ish. Lil puddy helped with anxiety too, he is such a playful thing but loves a good cuddle. Which is nice considering I couldn’t touch another human being for 10 days, that shit is needed trust me.
He got a new “suit” tie, and he loves it. He’s so chilled out I’ve never known a puddy like him. Smudge has given me some amazing company, and helped keep anxiety levels low.
So yeah even though being overly active still gets me a bit short of breath, I feel I can do more now too, and most, if not all, aches and pains are now just a memory.
I feel million times better.
Although the break has done me good, I could have done without it, well done without loosing the money at work. A week and half on sick pay is very noticeable, esspecially since it was my late shift at work, when I do most overtime.
Luckily not going out for a week and half has saved some cash, yeah I actually reached this payday with money in the bank, so mostly the money lost being off is still there because it’s been saved.
This in itself just shows going out and doing stuff costs too much, I need to find things to do with lil man that doesn’t cost too much, luckily spring is just round the corner so we can go to the park more often.
On a seperate note, today on our call his mother decided to tell me something that annoyed me.
The docs are putting him on a new subscription (medical kind) of melatonin. For those who don’t know what melatonin is, it’s a natural hormone, man made drug that helps short term sleep problems.
Now this isn’t the problem, obviously lil man needs sleep, but there are other ways to help him sleep better, but let’s not get into that.
Let me remind you he is a child with autism.
She also mentioned the docs suggesting using another drug soon, which I do not want him to have.
Risperidone, I don’t know if this is the actual one they want to prescribe, but it is the only one I can find on google that say it helps treat autism spectrum disorder (ASD).
From what I’ve heard and read, it either doesn’t help or it turns people into zombies.
Now this is something I don’t want, I explained I don’t want, and she comes back with “your not the one that has to deal with him 24/7, you only see him 3 hours during the week and one Sunday a month”.
Yeah I agree there, but I would love to see him more and more, I used to see him every day, just for an hour a day, and 2 Sunday’s a month, which was amazing.
Since covid shit started up, it went down to 1 hour a day Tuesday to Thursday and one Sunday a month for about 6-9 hours.
She won’t let me have him for whole weekends, which I would love.
BUT by god I still have a say.
Not being funny at all but I want my son to feel alive, I want my son to experience life to the fullest, I don’t want him zoning out or drugged up or high 24/7.
He is always good for me, when he has his meltdowns I quickly get him calmed down, I don’t shout at him and we talk through whats wrong, and afterwards he says sorry.
Yeah he says sorry for something he can’t control, it has even got him upset at times, but we talk and he understands.
Don’t get me wrong sometimes it is bad behaviour, as is with all kids, but being a parent with a son with autism you know, and can tell the difference between ASD meltdown and him just being a lil shit.
Either way he still says sorry, and we have a cuddle and all is happy hunky dorey.
Surely, if she decides to let the docs prescribe him this drug, I have a say and if I said no the docs have to listen right?
It pains me to even think he withh be put on this drug, in fact it kills me to even think she can do this without my say so.
Apparently my “views will be taken into consideration”, but “the ultimate decision lies with her” apparently.
Am I being selfish?
(Edit: let me just add, for clarity, she doesn’t work, she home schools lil man, and has no intentions of getting him into school as “he won’t adjust” and he spends pretty much all day every day stuck in the house, and since covid he hasn’t been to any home schooling groups or meetings, the only time he really get out the house is with me or to go to a PQA paid for “schooling” on a Saturday)
Ok that’s it for today folks, oh I almost forgot, it feels good to actually get back on my laptop to write my book, it’s just not the same doing it on my damn phone.
Good night, and I hope your week is going good, it’s almost the weekend haha. 2 day at work then a nice weekend ….. well deserved eh?
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