Rob (theplainandsimpleguy)

Men’s Mental Health: The Silent Struggle

Men’s Mental Health: Breaking the Silence

The Hidden Struggle of Men’s Mental Health

Mental health is a global issue affecting millions of people, but when it comes to men, the crisis is often overlooked. Cultural expectations and societal norms frequently pressure men to suppress their emotions, making it difficult for them to seek help. The statistics are alarming:

  • Three times as many men as women die by suicide.
  • Men aged 40-49 have the highest suicide rates in the UK.
  • Men report lower levels of life satisfaction than women.
  • Nearly 75% of missing adults are men.
  • 87% of rough sleepers are men.
  • Men are nearly three times as likely as women to become dependent on alcohol.
  • Men make up the vast majority of the prison population, with high rates of mental health issues.

These statistics, sourced from MentalHealth.org.uk and updated regularly, highlight the silent crisis affecting men worldwide. The problem is not just the prevalence of mental health issues but the reluctance of men to talk about them or seek professional help. And I know this struggle all too well because I have lived it.

My Journey Through Mental Health Struggles

For a long time, I suffered in silence. Like many men, I viewed admitting to mental health struggles as a sign of weakness. It took years for me to understand that seeking help is not a sign of failure-it’s a sign of strength.

I grew up in a turbulent environment, moving frequently due to circumstances beyond my control. My father abandoned us when I was three, leaving my mother to raise me and my brother alone. The instability and emotional turmoil shaped my childhood, and I often felt like I didn’t belong. I was always the quiet one, the one who observed more than he spoke. People saw me as timid, maybe even weak. But inside, I was battling thoughts and emotions I didn’t know how to express.

As a child, I had big dreams-becoming a firefighter or an RAF pilot. Instead, I found myself as an HGV technician, a profession I never envisioned for myself. I love my job, but some days, I feel like I just ended up here, like I never had a choice. Some days, I question everything: how did I get here? Why do I feel stuck? Is this all my life will ever be?

School was hell. My stammer made me a target for bullying. When I developed psoriasis, the bullying got worse. I lost friends, became withdrawn, and struggled with self-worth. Walking through the halls, my heart would pound, knowing that at any moment, someone would throw a comment my way, a shove, a laugh behind my back. I tried to ignore it, to brush it off, but the truth is, it broke something inside me. I felt like I was never good enough, never strong enough, never enough.

One of my lowest moments came when a group of kids set me up. One of them spread a rumour that I had insulted another boy’s family. That boy came after me with a gang—spitting, pushing, shouting threats. I was terrified. I fought back, but I was outnumbered. The physical bruises healed, but the emotional wounds stayed. I never told anyone what happened. Who would listen? Who would care?

In my early adulthood, things didn’t get easier. I entered a relationship that eventually turned toxic. At first, it felt right. It felt like I had found someone who saw me, who valued me. But slowly, control crept in. Financial abuse, emotional manipulation, and constant questioning drained me. By the time I realized what had happened, I was in over £25,000 of debt, suffering from depression, and feeling completely lost.

I remember nights spent lying awake, staring at the ceiling, wondering how my life had spiralled so far out of my control. I remember feeling like I had nowhere to turn, and no one who would understand what I was going through. And the worst part? I blamed myself. Maybe I wasn’t good enough. Maybe I was weak. Maybe I deserved this.

The Road to Recovery

It took everything in me to walk away from that toxic environment. Even after leaving, the scars remained—mentally, emotionally, and financially.

Recovering from mental health struggles is not an overnight process. It requires work, support, and above all, a willingness to confront the pain rather than bury it. I found solace in sharing my experiences, talking with people who truly listened, and taking control of my own narrative. Slowly but surely, I started to rebuild my life.

There are still difficult days. I still battle anxiety. The weight of past trauma still lingers. But now, I understand that these struggles do not define me. I have learned that seeking help is not a sign of weakness but an act of bravery.

I look back at everything I have survived, and I realize something important: I am still here. Despite everything, I am still standing. And that means something. It means I have a future, one that I can shape on my own terms. It means I have strength, even when I don’t feel it. It means I have hope.

Breaking the Stigma: A Message to Men

To every man who feels alone in his struggles: You are not alone.

Society has long conditioned men to suppress their emotions, to “man up” in the face of adversity. But bottling up emotions only fuels the fire of mental health issues. Admitting you are struggling is not a sign of weakness; it’s a sign of strength.

  • If you’re feeling overwhelmed, talk to someone. A close friend, a doctor, a therapist-anyone you trust.
  • Understand that your feelings are valid. Mental health struggles do not make you less of a man.
  • Prioritize self-care. Exercise, meditate, write-find healthy ways to release your emotions.
  • Seek professional help. Therapy is not just for crises; it’s for self-growth and healing.

Finally

Mental health is a journey, and no one should have to walk it alone. If you’re struggling, know that there is hope, and there is help.

To those reading this who have never struggled with mental health, I urge you to reach out to the men in your life. A simple conversation can be life-changing. Let’s break the stigma surrounding men’s mental health and create a world where no one feels they have to suffer in silence.

You are not alone. You are valued. You matter.

For anyone requiring help with mental health, check below for useful links and numbers I found. Obviously, I can’t find them for every single country in the world, I’m sorry.

Failing that, further below are my links to my socials, I am here for anyone who needs to talk.

United Kingdom

United States

  • National Suicide Prevention Lifeline – Dial 988 (24/7) | 988lifeline.org
  • NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) – Call 1-800-950-NAMI (6264) | www.nami.org
  • Crisis Text Line – Text HELLO to 741741 (24/7)

Canada

Australia

New Zealand

Europe

Global & Online Support

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2 comments

  1. You know, since the pandemic, it seems there’s been an increase in especially teen boys who struggle more severely than ever before. Within my family I know two, outside of the family several more.

    It’s absolutely true that this is a serious situation.

    For you to share your story is wonderful and probably cathartic. Writing, whether privately or on a public forum, is a form of healing.

    Thank you for sharing.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • Yes, there does seem to be a bigger issue than ever before, or maybe it has always been there but never spoken about or approached.

      There is a social thing there where a boy or man can’t show weakness because it makes them less of a man, which is so wrong.

      It’s more noticeable now because more people are opening up, we need to keep up the appearance that it isn’t weak to show emotion or share your stories.

      It is tougher for guys to talk about it but breaking that boundary is freeing and a big part of healing.

      You’re very welcome, I hope many more get the message ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

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